This time we set out to explore the shallow end of the whisky pool. Sixteen blended scotches in a blind test shoot-out to find out which ones stand out as drinkable and which ones that should be left on the bottom shelf. The results were in some cases very surprising.

Sometimes you just got to take one for the team. When you are a vivid whisky enthusiast you always seem to end up being asked to give recommendations on which whisky to buy. Often those questions refer to the well-known cheap blended scotches since those are the brands constantly being advertised and stocked at bars. Well, to be able to give a straight answer and just not say that they should splurge a little bit more and buy a single malt we’ve now done our homework (even if that answer still holds the truth).

At first there was some hesitation to whether we should do this or not. Persevering sixteen blends (+ two finals) take quite the time and it’s a lot of ”not-so-good” whisky to taste. But it ended up being a really fun experience, because let’s just face it; It’s fun to see people ingest things they don’t like the taste of. There were some tasting notes thrown around that isn’t suitable to write in an article about the event. And there were a couple of blends that wasn’t as horrible as they were in our collective minds. But more about that later.

The line-up
When we select line-ups we always search for variety within a certain set of preconditioned parameters. We wanted to have most of the best-selling blends we could think of included. We also included some brands we know are bestsellers in other countries too. It’s impossible to make the perfect line-up, but we do think we included a lot of brands people are familiar with and are able to find near where they are.

Lastly, we (of course) were restricted to whiskies we own and were able (willing) to buy. That’s why we ended up with these contestants:

Bell’s Original
Cluny
Cutty Sark Original
Dundee
Famous Grouse
For Peat’s Sake
Grant’s Family Reserve
High Commissioner
Johnny Walker Red Label
King Robert II
Lauder’s Finest
Latitude 55 Degrees
Peter Dawson Special
Queen Margot 3 YO
Stewart’s Finest
The Talisman

The favourites and the dislikes
This is sixteen cheap blended whiskies. To name any of them as favourites would be misleading. Generally, I don’t mind drinking a cheap blend when offered because I do think a bad whisky is better than many other spirits. I used to have High Commissioner to drink when cooking outside before I became a whisky nut (the smoke from the grill and the ever-so-often chilly weather would affect the whisky anyway), so I would say that this was my top contender going in to this exercise. When it comes to the bad tasting side, Johnny Walker Red Label has gotten a fair share of punishment from me, as well as Lauder’s Finest.

When it comes to my friend, he shared my view on Johnny Walker Red Label as being one of the worst of those he tasted going in to this blind tasting. He really couldn’t produce a “favourite” though, since this is whiskies which are had at times when smell and taste aren’t the most important thing about the beverage consumed.

The side quest – Bottom shelf nightmares
This time we knew that a side quest related to figuring out correct whiskies by smell and taste wouldn’t amount to anything but a guessing game. So, we made two finals instead: One for the top contenders and one for the bottom shelf nightmares. Yes. The last thing we did was to taste the bottom candidates from the four brackets, trying to decide which one was the worst of them all.

The method and the preparations
If you are interested in how we prepare, and which method we use to make this a truly random test, the full rundown can be found in paragraphs 2 and 3 in the Bowmore shoot-out article. We did the same thing this time. The short version is that we randomize sixteen samples into four brackets. The four winners of those move on to a final bracket, and then the best whisky is chosen. The four whiskies in the final aren’t necessarily the four best ones, but the winner will be the one that stands out.

Bracket 1

High Commissioner
Latitude 55 Degrees
Cutty Sark Original
Bell’s Original

Reflections
When it comes down to comparing blends, there are mainly two factors which matter the most: How well do they hide the unpleasant flavours of the cheaper ingredients and how balanced do they manage to be. In this bracket Bell’s Original was a clear winner for me, since it felt really well balanced and had a touch of peat coming through, hiding a lot of the poor quality behind it. It did seem like they put in the effort to blend this with best taste for the price in mind. High Commissioner and Cutty Sark Original were almost tied second, where the High commissioner was pretty mild with the grain spirit toned down and Cutty Sark had a nice spiciness to it.

My friend had Cutty Sark Original as number one and thought that it, together with Bell’s Original was the clear winners in this bracket far above the other two. The biggest loser was the Latitude 55 degrees which both thought was really bad. My scribbled notes reveal notes of a thick fake aspartame butterscotch and a smell of public toilets. It did have some peatiness coming through, but it really didn’t help it along.

My result
1. Bell’s Original
2. High Commissioner
3. Cutty Sark Original
4. Latitude 55 Degrees

My friend’s result
1. Cutty Sark Original
2. Bell’s Original
3. High Commissioner
4. Latitude 55 Degrees

Bracket 2

Lauder’s Finest
Dundee Finest
Johnny Walker Red Label
Stewart’s Finest

Reflections
This was a bracket in which we were in total agreeance about the results. It was very surprising that Johnny Walker Red Label was the clear winner for both of us but it’s a well-balanced, discreet blend with a hint of butterscotch and smoke. Stewart’s finest came in second, but quite a bit behind the Red Label. It is a laid-back whisky with a not so intrusive butterscotch character. Not good, but not unpleasant.

The Dundee Finest is not a good blend at all and it has a big chunk of cardboard in the middle of it. The only nice thing to say about it is that there’s a rye note coming through that’s quite acceptable. It still stood a good bit above the last one in this bracket, the Lauder’s Finest. It’s really unpleasant and tastes like eating cheap badly made butterscotch from a public toilet’s metallic urinal. Many of the blends produces butterscotch notes, which means that it’s one of those flavours that gets toned down, but in this case, it’s a thick taste that invades the mouth and just won’t go away.

My result
1. Johnny Walker Red Label
2. Stewart’s Finest
3. Dundee Finest
4. Lauder’s Finest

My friend’s result
1. Johnny Walker Red Label
2. Stewart’s Finest
3. Dundee Finest
4. Lauder’s Finest

Bracket 3

For Peat’s Sake
Queen Margot 3 YO
Cluny
Talisman

Reflections
This was another bracket in which we had the same results and agreed fully in the reasoning why it ended up the way it did. For peat’s sake was a clear winner, with a big help from its peatiness covering up most of the not so pleasant flavours. Cluny came in second, and it did so by a big margin against the last two. It tasted a bit grainy and “boozy”, but overall it was pretty laid-back and inoffensive. The Talisman came in third and this was one of those extremely thick, fake butterscotch tasting blends. It’s not as bad as some of the others in that category though.

In last place by a huge margin was the Queen Margot 3 YO. Let us first acknowledge the fact that they put that three on the bottle. That is a bold move and it’s definitely worth a pat on the back on those responsible for it. It’s just too bad that it tastes absolutely repulsive. There were tasting notes thrown in the air which don’t fit in this article.

My result
1. For Peat’s Sake
2. Cluny
3. Talisman
4. Queen Margot 3 YO

My friend’s result
1. For Peat’s Sake
2. Cluny
3. Talisman
4. Queen Margot 3 YO

Bracket 4

Peter Dawson Special
King Robert II
Grant’s Family Reserve
Famous Grouse

Reflections
The last bracket was probably the most diverse in smell and taste and also the one where we disagreed on everything except one thing; The Grant’s Family Reserve. So let us start from the bottom. In this bracket, Grant’s was worst by a mile. Both of us thought it tasted like paint thinner and bad sweetness. It leans heavily towards the cheaply made grain whisky part and when tasted together with other blends almost felt like there was no malt whisky included.

The other three we had in different places but it just takes a quick analysis to see that it really was the King Robert II that we disagreed on since the other two is in the same order in both of our results. Peter Dawson Special won my friend’s bracket and came in second in mine. It’s one of those fake butterscotch blends, but this is not as intruding as many of the others. Famous Grouse was my friend’s runner up and my third place. We both agreed that there was an odd note in this one that really wasn’t found in any of the other blends. I described it as smelling like there was cooked rice in it (just to be sure: There’s most definitely not any rice included).

Lastly, the King Robert II. To me it felt balanced and even though it had most of the standard blended scotch notes come through both in smell and taste, it felt that they were deliberately made to not stand out. My friend though it was a bit flat.

My result
1. King Robert II
2. Peter Dawson Special
3. Famous Grouse
4. Grant’s Family Reserve

My friend’s result
1. Peter Dawson Special
2. Famous Grouse
3. King Robert II
4. Grant’s Family Reserve

The grand finale

My final bracket
Bell’s Original
Johnny Walker Red Label
For Peat’s Sake
King Robert II

My result
1. Johnny Walker Red Label
2. For Peat’s Sake
3. King Robert II
4. Bell’s Original

My friend’s final bracket
Cutty Sark Original
Johnny Walker Red Label
For Peat’s Sake
Peter Dawson Special

My friend’s result
1. Johnny Walker Red Label
2. Cutty Sark Original
3. Peter Dawson Special
4. For Peat’s Sake

Reflections
The results are very surprising. Johnny Walker Red Label has always been the butt of a joke about bad whisky for the both of us. It’s still not a particularly great whisky, but it is way better than all the other blends here. They make a very good job of keeping all the flavours balanced. When we made the reveal, we saved the one we both thought was the worst and the one we thought was the best and all the way up to the reveal, we still thought that the Red Label was the one that was about to be crowned “worst whisky”. This result is a great example of why we do these big shoot-outs. To give our predetermined mindsets a onceover.

Let’s take a quick look at the rest of the contestants in the final. For me, the For Peat’s Sake came in second. The peatiness covers a lot of the unpleasant flavours and makes it fairly drinkable. The Bell’s and the King Robert II blends are balanced blends and both come off as easy sippers. There’s still all the tells of cheap whisky in both of them though.

Lastly, let’s talk about Cutty Sark, which probably is the whisky we disagreed the most over. I put it third in its bracket and my friend sent it all the way to become the runner up in the final. It was the one whisky except the Red Label that had a spicyness to it, but it was a bit too grainy for me.

Side Quest – The bottom shelf nightmares
This is the four worst whiskies. We chose them blindly and by our own devices. We ended up with the same four. But there is a line here. Grant’s Family Reserve and Lauder’s Finest was without question the two worst whiskies in this shoot-out and out of those two Grant’s Finest was, by a clear margin, the most horrible of them. They need no more descriptions than that. These should be avoided at all times and should be the last option if options are given.

The other two was bad. Very bad. But nowhere near the bottom two. I had Queen Margot 3 YO as the least repulsive of them and my friend chose Latitude 55 Degrees, but they are just about on the same level.

My bottom shelf
Latitude 55 Degrees
Lauder’s Finest
Queen Margot 3 YO
Grant’s Family Reserve

My result
1. Grant’s Family Reserve
2. Lauder’s Finest
3. Latitude 55 Degrees
4. Queen Margot 3 YO

My friend’s bottom shelf
Latitude 55 Degrees
Lauder’s Finest
Queen Margot 3 YO
Grant’s Family Reserve

My friend’s result
1. Grant’s Family Reserve
2. Lauder’s Finest
3. Queen Margot 3 YO
4. Latitude 55 Degrees

So, to the final conclusion. Even though this was a set of 16 not so great tasting whiskies it really was a fun experience and we had a lot of fun doing it. The reveal contained a long streak of laughter when all the predetermined mindsets were thrown out of the window, and when it was revealed that Johnny Walker Red Label was the best one by far we just couldn’t believe it. The only hard part was the part when we had to go back and taste the four worst whiskies again in a separate bracket, because they are indeed very bad ones. But, just to be clear: There are worse ones out there.

Thank you for reading and do this yourself. You never know what you really think unless you put your predetermined attitude to the test.

William

Published 2020-03-05